It has been said before that potting training tales are not for the faint of heart. In truth, parenting in all its entirety is not for the faint of heart.
I like how Jennifer Isenman put it in her blog titled "The Side Effects of Having Kids (Please read before reproducing) (Isenman, 2014). To summarize her comments, children may cause... -Memory loss -Panic Attacks -Restlessness -Weight Gain -Sleeplessness -Irritability -Confusion -Dizziness -Sexual dysfunction -Shortness of breath -Numbness and cramping -Brain fog And this is often all in the first few years never mind the teenage years or subsequent kids! To put it mildly, parenting stresses you out!!! According to an online survey by the American Psychological Association (APA), 73 percent of parents report family responsibilities as a significant source of stress and while over two-thirds of parents think their stress level has slight to no impact on their child’s stress level, only 14 percent of tweens and teens reported that they are not bothered when their parent is stressed (APA, 2010)." In the class that I am continuing with this semester titled "Teaching and Learning" I have been given the opportunity to facilitate a 20-25 minute class at our local Early Childhood Family Education center. The class is titled "A Date with Dad" and is focused for fathers and their kids. In discussing the lesson with the family educator we mutually agreed that doing a lesson on stress would be beneficial. This is good, because honestly, I get stressed out! Why not teach myself. Given the demands of a normal day, how can we not avoid to feel stress upon ourselves? Stress comes in so many forms, and often times I have found it is the underlying hidden challenges I am facing that ultimately are producing in me the external reactions that manifest themselves as stress. Feeling tense, restless, irritable, or impatient with my kids may seem to have everything to do with the fact that they continue to jump on the coffee table with underwear on their head, but deeply it is a hard conversation I had at work with a community member, or fear about the remaining propane in our tank that is driving those responses. Stress will always be present, but our response to it is largely directed by the strategies and resources we have in play to mitigate them. When stress is left untouched, it compounds and builds and over time that generation escalates until the real symptoms are hidden deep under the tip of the iceberg. I am hoping through my class, and in subsequent weeks to begin to focus on some of the strategies I have identified that can be helpful to manage the stress currently placed upon me. Some of these include: -Disconnecting from technology, especially work related projects and emails, and other forms of media that simply crowd my mind from being at rest -Balancing schedules to ensure my days are not overloaded. Say no to commitments, even when they are good. -Sleep at least 8 hours a night. This means my homework assignments and free time are done by 9:30 pm, knowing it will take at least 30-45 minutes to settle my mind and body to sleep. 10:30-6:30 would give the needed 8 hours. Of course some days getting 6-7 is fine, but the more 8's I can manage the better I will feel. -Negative-talk gets me no where. Motivate myself with positive thinking. If I cannot change it, don't dwell on it. -Self-time is important too. Find time for the things that are important to rejuvenate my spirit and soul. Writing, skiing, hiking, reading (for fun). -Nourish yourself with good, healthy food. Thankfully I married Sarah! Cod liver oil, soaked grains, fruits and veggies are IN. -Express your feelings, emotions and concerns with caring people. Don't let it sink inside and go undisturbed. -Connect with loved ones. Set a time for that date night, enjoy a board game with the kids. These are all helpful strategies and sprinkling them throughout our days and weeks I believe would help me for sure become a more balanced, patient and resourceful parent to the kids I want to cherish and love. What about you? What do you do to manage the compounding stress parenting brings? Which of these strategies are you in most need to implement in your life this month? References: American Psychological Association (2010). Managing stress for a healthy family. Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/helpcenter/managing-stress.aspx Isenman, Jenny (2014, March). The side effects of having kids (please read before reproducing). Retrieved from thestir.cafemom.com/being_a_mom/170356/the_side_effects_of_having O’Malley, Sheila [Practical Parenting]. (2015, June, 30). Coping with stress for parents [Video file]. Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLR58GQVzg4
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AuthorJeremy David Freeman lives in Minnesota with his wife Sarah. They have six kids (Adelynn, Peter, Benjamin, Paul, Mark and Samuel) and together enjoy the simple things of life: gardening, writing, sewing, baking and woodworking. Archives
April 2024
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